Coming home from the hospital or birthing center with a new baby can be slightly overwhelming. Especially for a first time mom. First, you make sure baby is properly strapped into the car seat, you adjust and readjust everything a few times to make sure it's tight but not too tight and then you take the most nerve-wracking drive home, even it's just 5 minutes, it feels like the most treacherous drive EVER. And yes- it's normal to sit in the backseat.
You finally arrive home, get baby out of the car and walk into your house, for the first time as either a new family or with a new addition. These are the top 5 things you will probably want or need most:
1) Yummy food and beverages- quick. You have probably spent the last 2 days (or more) eating food you aren't crazy about, or wishing for something yummy and homemade. You should arrange to have made meals in advance or set yourself up with a group of well wishers who bring food to you- fresh, daily! (More about that in an upcoming post) This way, whoever is there with you; husband, mom, sister, etc can pop something into the oven, or make you a fresh meal with something nice to drink, like an herbal tea or a smoothie.
2) A shower! You will probably be so happy to see a bathroom with your products and towels, it can be a great relaxing moment to have a nice hot shower before settling in with your new baby. Someone should be there to hold the baby, (this is when they could also be making you tea!) and to lay out a fresh outfit for you to hang out in. You'll want something comfortable, like yoga clothes or even flannel PJ's. You'll still be looking pregnant and will be bleeding and possibly be in some discomfort, so you won't be hopping back into your skinny jeans - so sorry to burst your bubble.
3) Before you hop into that bed, fresh sheets! A nurse friend of mine is adamant about having fresh sheets on her own bed at least once a week (be honest now, most of us don't) and she makes a point of changing her patients sheets to make sure they feel clean and comfortable. We all know how nice it feels to climb into a soft clean bed. (This type of thing could be done by your post-partum doula, your mother or whoever is around to help out)
4)Peace and quiet- yes we know everyone is excited to see the baby and hear about the birth and take pictures and bring gifts. That can WAIT! A new family, and especially a woman who has just given birth, need time to decompress, relax and enjoy some quiet bonding time. The first few days fly by, and it's so important that space is given. (Visitor- If you are bringing food, you're the exception, but please just drop it off and don't expect to hold the baby. He or she will probably be breastfeeding or sleeping in Mom's arms)
5) Someone to talk to. Yes I know what #4 said, but something so important, especially in those first few weeks is for someone to just listen. Giving birth is not some small insignificant thing in a woman's life. There is much to discuss, many feelings to can come up, and the one thing every single mom needs is someone she can unload on. Breastfeeding difficulties, birth trauma, stitches, sleeplessness, baby blues- these are all things that can be overwhelming for you after having a baby and knowing someone is there to say "it's going to be ok. You're doing an amazing job." can really change the way things look. On the other hand, sometimes you will just want to spend hours rehashing every moment of the labor and birth and the amazing feeling you get looking at your new baby. Working as a doula I get to hear all of these stories, the good, the bad, the sad, the amazed, the proud- it's all part of the process.
These aren't the only things you (or the new mom in your life) might need- but it's quite basic. Some pampering, some rest, some reassurance, and some help around the house.
I recommend to my clients that they line up some support for after the baby is born. I don't mean, "oh, we have tons of friends who can't wait to come over and see the baby, I'm sure they'll know not to stay too long". Most new moms need some help with housework, some meal preparation to make sure they are eating and drinking enough, someone to help with diaper changes and to hold the baby while they shower or have a nap. It can be so beneficial to the new family, so they can rest and bond, and it makes the transition to parenthood so much smoother.
Thanks for reading, Megan
You finally arrive home, get baby out of the car and walk into your house, for the first time as either a new family or with a new addition. These are the top 5 things you will probably want or need most:
1) Yummy food and beverages- quick. You have probably spent the last 2 days (or more) eating food you aren't crazy about, or wishing for something yummy and homemade. You should arrange to have made meals in advance or set yourself up with a group of well wishers who bring food to you- fresh, daily! (More about that in an upcoming post) This way, whoever is there with you; husband, mom, sister, etc can pop something into the oven, or make you a fresh meal with something nice to drink, like an herbal tea or a smoothie.
2) A shower! You will probably be so happy to see a bathroom with your products and towels, it can be a great relaxing moment to have a nice hot shower before settling in with your new baby. Someone should be there to hold the baby, (this is when they could also be making you tea!) and to lay out a fresh outfit for you to hang out in. You'll want something comfortable, like yoga clothes or even flannel PJ's. You'll still be looking pregnant and will be bleeding and possibly be in some discomfort, so you won't be hopping back into your skinny jeans - so sorry to burst your bubble.
3) Before you hop into that bed, fresh sheets! A nurse friend of mine is adamant about having fresh sheets on her own bed at least once a week (be honest now, most of us don't) and she makes a point of changing her patients sheets to make sure they feel clean and comfortable. We all know how nice it feels to climb into a soft clean bed. (This type of thing could be done by your post-partum doula, your mother or whoever is around to help out)
4)Peace and quiet- yes we know everyone is excited to see the baby and hear about the birth and take pictures and bring gifts. That can WAIT! A new family, and especially a woman who has just given birth, need time to decompress, relax and enjoy some quiet bonding time. The first few days fly by, and it's so important that space is given. (Visitor- If you are bringing food, you're the exception, but please just drop it off and don't expect to hold the baby. He or she will probably be breastfeeding or sleeping in Mom's arms)
5) Someone to talk to. Yes I know what #4 said, but something so important, especially in those first few weeks is for someone to just listen. Giving birth is not some small insignificant thing in a woman's life. There is much to discuss, many feelings to can come up, and the one thing every single mom needs is someone she can unload on. Breastfeeding difficulties, birth trauma, stitches, sleeplessness, baby blues- these are all things that can be overwhelming for you after having a baby and knowing someone is there to say "it's going to be ok. You're doing an amazing job." can really change the way things look. On the other hand, sometimes you will just want to spend hours rehashing every moment of the labor and birth and the amazing feeling you get looking at your new baby. Working as a doula I get to hear all of these stories, the good, the bad, the sad, the amazed, the proud- it's all part of the process.
These aren't the only things you (or the new mom in your life) might need- but it's quite basic. Some pampering, some rest, some reassurance, and some help around the house.
I recommend to my clients that they line up some support for after the baby is born. I don't mean, "oh, we have tons of friends who can't wait to come over and see the baby, I'm sure they'll know not to stay too long". Most new moms need some help with housework, some meal preparation to make sure they are eating and drinking enough, someone to help with diaper changes and to hold the baby while they shower or have a nap. It can be so beneficial to the new family, so they can rest and bond, and it makes the transition to parenthood so much smoother.
Thanks for reading, Megan
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